Why You’re Not Getting Booked to Speak (And What to Do Before You Ever Pitch)

Most advice about landing speaking opportunities focuses on one thing: the pitch.

Write a better email.
Refine your topic.
Highlight your credentials.

And while those things matter, they are not the reason most people get booked. Because by the time your pitch is opened, one question has already been subconsciously answered:

“Do I know who this person is?”

If the answer is no, you are asking the event organizer to take a risk. If the answer is yes, you are simply giving them a reason to say yes.

That’s the shift.

Speaking opportunities are not just awarded. They are warmed up over time through visibility, proximity, and trust.This is the part most people skip.

So let’s break down exactly how to position yourself before the pitch so that when you do reach out, it feels like a natural next step instead of a cold ask.

1. Start With Strategic Visibility (Not Random Posting)

If you want to be invited into conversations, you need to already be part of them. This means being intentional about where and how you show up. Start by identifying:

• 3–5 events you would actually want to speak at
• The platforms they are most active on (usually Instagram)
• The types of content they post (speaker announcements, education, community moments)

Then engage with purpose:

• Leave thoughtful comments that add insight, not just praise
• Share their posts and include your own perspective or takeaway
• Respond to their stories with genuine replies that spark conversation

This is not about being loud. It’s about being consistently present in the right rooms.

Action step:
Set a 10-minute daily habit. Engage with 1–2 events and 2–3 speakers every day for 2 weeks.

2. Build Familiarity Through Repetition

Recognition doesn’t happen from one interaction. It happens from repeated exposure. Think about it from the organizer’s perspective. They are seeing hundreds of names. Yours needs to feel familiar before it feels impressive.

Ways to build that familiarity:

• Show up in their comments regularly
• Reply to multiple stories over time (not all at once)
• Share their events or speakers more than once

You are creating a pattern: “Oh, I’ve seen this person before.” That single thought dramatically increases your chances of being taken seriously later.

Action step:
Aim for 5–10 meaningful touchpoints with an event or organizer before ever pitching.

3. Align Your Content With the Stage You Want

One of the biggest disconnects is this: People want to speak on certain topics… but their content doesn’t reflect it.

If you want to speak about:

• Email marketing
• Passive income
• Pivoting into education

Then your content should already be teaching, exploring, and sharing those ideas. Event organizers are not just evaluating your pitch. They are checking:

• Your Instagram
• Your website
• Your authority in that topic

If your content is inconsistent, your message feels unclear. If your content is aligned, your pitch feels obvious.

Action step:
Choose 2–3 core topics you want to be known for and create content around them weekly.

4. Build Relationships With Current Speakers

This is one of the most overlooked strategies. Events often:

• Rebook past speakers
• Ask current speakers for referrals
• Pull from their existing network

So instead of only focusing on organizers, start connecting with the people already on stage. Engage with them:

• Comment on their content
• Share their work
• Start conversations in a natural way

You are not asking for anything. You are building proximity. Because later, when opportunities come up, your name is no longer random.

Action step:
Identify 5 speakers from your target events and engage with them consistently for 2–3 weeks.

5. Create Your Own “Proof of Stage”

You don’t need a big stage to prove you can speak. You need evidence that you can teach, communicate, and hold attention. Record clips of you speaking, save testimonials or feedback and document results from attendees. This becomes your “speaker portfolio” before you ever have a formal one.

6. Position Yourself as Part of the Community

If you only show up when you want to be booked, it’s obvious.

Instead, become someone who actively supports the event.

• Share their speaker announcements
• Talk about why the event matters
• Highlight lessons or moments from past events

This does two things:

1. It builds goodwill
2. It signals alignment

Event organizers want speakers who care about the experience, not just the exposure.

Action step:
Share 1–2 pieces of content per week that highlights events or speakers you admire.

7. Time Your Pitch Strategically

Once you’ve built visibility, familiarity, and alignment, then you pitch.

And when you do, it should feel like:

• A continuation of a conversation
• A natural extension of your content
• A clear value-add to their audience

Not a cold introduction.

At this point, your pitch is no longer trying to convince them you belong.

It’s simply showing them how you fit. Most people treat visibility and pitching as separate things. But they are not. Visibility is what makes your pitch believable. Familiarity is what makes it feel safe. Alignment is what makes it feel obvious. When you build those first, your pitch doesn’t have to work nearly as hard.

If you’re ready to turn this foundation into actual speaking opportunities, I created a resource with the exact pitch templates you can use for:

• Speaking engagements
• Podcast interviews
• Brand features

Because once you understand how to position yourself before the pitch, the pitch itself becomes a whole lot easier.

xo Noella